I recently started watching this new Netflix show, “Diagnosis”. It is interesting. The show is based off of Dr. Lisa Sanders NY Times column, in which she utilizes crowdsourcing to help people with complex/confusing medical cases to find a diagnosis. The hope with crowdsourcing someone’s story is that someone else in the whole world can help this patient find a diagnosis.
One thing I find most interesting about the show is how important a diagnosis is, even if the disease remains untreatable. It makes me think about what the importance of a label really is.
Psychology today describes the need to label as a way to organize our world and assist us with making decisions. If I label myself as a nurse, it helps me to decide what jobs to apply for and how to pursue my career. However, my personal issue becomes….labels can be so entrapping, and I am so easily excited by each and every opportunity, idea, identity I could take on. I don’t want to pinned down by a label.
On one hand, it is really really fun to dabble in so many different worlds; music, healthcare, travel, climbing, religion/spirituality, social justice, etc.
On the other hand, it can lead to being spread too thin. I feel that approaching already.
Lots is happening. I have done a “soft” move back to Colorado and taken on a new job on a cardiology floor. I have received most of my belongings back and been unpacking boxes, realizing the things I really missed and also noticing what I don’t care that much about. My life since coming home has been like receiving all these boxes. Some things are so so great, and other things (being scheduled, commitments to family and friends, America’s hustle culture, car and health and renters insurance)…I kind of want to pack those back up into a little box and shove them away.
I think I am learning in some ways. I am trying on a job with a slightly slower pace than the ER, prioritizing sleep, attempting to avoid promising my time and energy to anyone/anything quite yet etc etc. Even so, I know myself and how this will be one of my biggest challenges moving forward.
Diagnosis also leads to Brian. Still no clear diagnosis and a lot of unknown. It’s scary. It’s relieving also. Sitting in the grey is actually a lot easier because there is more hope in the grey. He has been doing really well recovering from the biopsy, and I am enjoying the time we are spending together:)
Here are some photos from the good stuff I’ve been unpacking these past few weeks!
There is obviously much to be thankful for. It is not always easier to see, but in some ways, this blog has become a cup half-full journal for me. Thanks for continuing with me while I unbox my life.
Ashley
Creating Space 
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